'This is the last time I'll abandon you!

This is the last time I'll forget you!

I wish I could'

I am a miserable fucker aren't I? One would think, with all the nice things I have to say about other people, I could say some wonderful things to myself that would make me feel better, but no, miserable fucker. I am miserable.

However within my misery I wonder at life, it has become an obsession lately (which is better than death like last time I guess), how people are made for it, and display it in everything they do. 'Life in every breath' And how people are formend, how beautiful they are, everyone not just the good looking ones, and how wierd that is! That lumps of fleash and bone and gristle can be beautiful... The most beautiful thing of all.

In fact its killing me.